It was a cold December day circa 2021 when my now-Master decided to abduct me. We had started the weekend like many others in those days… at a hotel playing sick games in our perfect little bubble of depravity. That weekend involved drowning, beatings, speculums, and more. But the crowning gem started in the car on the way home.
My headspace was already wrecked. I was walking on sunshine and endorphins. High off the fumes of indecency and violence. It all came crashing down before I could ask, “Where are we going?”
He started sighing as we careened down Broadway Street. Small, angry sighs at first. Then bigger and angrier and louder and meaner. It sent me into a vicious mode of flight that I couldn’t shake. I tried not to telegraph my thoughts by looking at the door handle.
Not too long before that day, I had explained how my step-father used to sigh. I would get frenzied internally but outwardly go still. As if any slight eye movement in the wrong direction would cause him to lash out. That to me, pain followed sighs and side glances.
My hands gripped the seams of my jeans and before I knew it his hand came fast. Slamming my head into the passenger side window. Again. And again. And again. I screamed in terror. Begging him for mercy. He began raining blows down then with no rhyme or reason. It was a calculated onslaught meant to wear my thin shred of humanity away and leave a caged animal.
Neither of us can exactly remember what was said on that short drive but the outcome was clear. My mind twisted in fear as this stranger was poised to kill me and my family. I was at his mercy. We were not on the way home as thought when we left the hotel. Instead, we pulled into a Buffalo Wild Wings parking lot a not far from our original destination.
He exited the car and came around to open my door. “Don’t make a fucking sound.” He snarled as he jerked me out of the car. He held on tightly to my wrist and dragged me forward. I looked desperately around for an onlooker. Something to say “this isn’t real” or maybe that it was. My vision swam as the entryway came into focus. He pushed me through the open door, standing behind me like a gentleman would.
I kept my eyes downcast as he arranged seating for us. I could find that seat blindfolded today. I don’t remember much past that. He ordered for us, me too out of it to even meet the server’s gaze. I’m thoroughly glad that she didn’t call the police as my mind was screaming for at the time. When our drinks came, in front of god and everyone, he scrunched up his straw wrapper into a ball and shot it at my face. What a pretty sight that must have been for him as he dug out his phone to capture it forever.
I looked towards the only other occupied table to see if they had noticed. No one was paying us any mind. The televisions blared at me as somewhere basketball was being played as though nothing were out of the ordinary. I asked to use the bathroom. “You have five minutes.” He agreed, but, “Give me your phone.”
The rest of the night unfolded in a rather unfun way. We learned that I would refuse aftercare given enough abuse which led to me sleeping in my car outside of Axelrad. Live and learn. The two mementos I took from the night. The picture he took and a giant fucking lump on the side of my head!
